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On Walking – Ramblin’ Amorin

Brendan Amorin, Staff Writer

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Ramblin’ Amorin — “Whining about school, so you don’t have to”

Good morning, afternoon, and evening, ladies and gentlemen of BC High. Today, I stand before you with a mighty crusade bestowed upon me by the higher powers of this outlet of propaganda. I, and I alone, have been tasked with the taxing duty of alerting the public to the multitude of flaws that plague our community. Resistance will be fierce, but someone must at long last take up this dangerous job. In describing these crimes against society, I will use the terms “transgression” and “grievance” interchangeably. In terms of housecleaning matters, I lastly, and most firmly, want to declare that I take my work very seriously. These are serious issues that shake the very foundation upon which this institution was founded over 150 years ago. Protecting the traditions that have journeyed through three centuries of Jesuit education will never be a laughing matter.

A logical beginning for this endeavor is to first approach those issues most proximate to my experiences recently. With that said, I must alarm the community that we are, indeed, in grave danger. As we proceed through our daily studies and activities, our atmosphere is being encroached upon by a leftist agenda. No, I do not refer to the coalition of liberal-minded politicians championed by the likes of Jim Webb and Martin O’Malley. Rather, I mean that the enemy of our very livelihood is none other than our tendency to walk on the left side of the hallway or stairs.

While walking up the stairs a few days ago on the way to my locker, I was swarmed by a large mass of students crowding both sides of the steps. In a reasonable fit of rage, the thought “How dare you?!” flooded into my mind. Who gives these savages the right to take up both sides of the stairs? The answer is no one. When you and your parents sign a contract to this school, you are promised a safe learning environment. Dare I say it, these scoundrels infringe on my right to safety! Do not tell me that your deep conversation about the morality of the exclusion of punters in fantasy football is more important than every other person in the school. As Richard Sherman, a respectable Stanford alumni, said, fantasy football is insignificant to the safety of others. We have all watched as that poor soul looks upon the flood of students engulfing the stairs as his dream of catching the early train home ceases to exist. Today, I stand up for the little guy: the honest man. Enough is enough.

What alarms me the most is how brainwashed we are to accept this situation. Our minds preoccupy themselves with what is to come next rather than the journey there. When you think about it, walking to and from class is probably the easiest thing you will do all day. Yet, I witness countless awkward exchanges in the hallway on a daily basis. People, we must do better. Any pyramid of needs of survival you will learn in Ethics will tell you that relationship is crucial to the well-being of humans. However, you must transcend the self-centered needs––in this case, as an example, a test or quiz––in order to be concerned with others. Right now, an individualistic mindset dominates our student body, and as a result, “It’s a jungle out there,” to quote Randy Newman.

Of course, what kind of trailblazer would I be without providing any solutions? In terms of policy, the school should not have to change anything. Policing the hallways is ridiculous when the people should be able to employ autocracy to solve this problem. With that said, I graciously provide you all with, as I like to call it, “The Credos of Civility.” Primarily, and most obviously, walk on the right side of the hallway or stairs. You know, right as in correct. The name of the direction literally tells you that you are walking where you should be. Secondly, single file is the style. Even if you walk on the right side, respect this thing called personal boundaries. Walking single file on both sides creates an efficient flow while leaving some room and allowing for no awkward exchanges. I do not know if you are aware, but you can talk to someone in single file, too. It may seem preposterous, but it is, in fact, true. Lastly, something I have yet to address: entering classrooms. If you have to cross the stream of people on the left side in order to enter your class, do not just cut people off. Wait for the right opportunity: an opening or an offer from someone to let you pass. Passing in front of people is rude and intolerable.

As useful as these provisions can be, there is an even simpler rule to live by: being a courteous person. Treat walking as if you are driving. Actually, in the case of Massachusetts drivers, do the exact opposite, or else students will be flipping each other off in the hallways. If everyone were to be aware of the needs of others over themselves, then several people would be worrying about you. Now, I may not be the best at math, but several people outnumber your individual self. Do what instinct tells you is the right thing to do, and it will go a long way in making BC High better for everyone.

Thank you so much for reading, and if you have any grievances for me to share with the community, you can reach me at






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On Walking – Ramblin’ Amorin